Little room for air

Finally able to find a few minutes to blog tonight. It has been tough for me lately. I just don't find the time. Blogging has become a type of therapy and outlet for me. I love writing and reflecting on my day or a thought or a cute story. So, when I am not blogging you must know I am buried to my ears in life. The idea of not having 15 minutes to blog a day has really highlighted to me that I never take the time or am given the time to breath on my own, all by myself. I am smothered from the minute I wake up until the last person in my house has gone to sleep. Then I begin to emerge and regroup. This is typically at 10pm.

I can now say that I understand fully the issues that stay-at-home moms have with losing themselves into the people they love. I am trying to catch myself from that before it is too late. Let me tell you, it is tough and not nearly as easy as people say. I was told to go to the gym and burn off the stress. I do that now every weekday. It is nice and I am getting great exercise yet I am still not being given the chance to breath. Dropping Pirate off at the Kid's Gym and walking over to a cardio machine and exercising for an hour does not help me with the things in life that are burying me... keeping in touch with friends, looking for a job, paying my bills, peace and quiet at a decent hour, etc. It's actually setting me back on my available time.

I need to start getting on the bandwagon of finding a job now that the economy is starting to turn upward yet I am struggling with finding the time to do so. It is tough to hold a business conversation when a 2 year old is crying in the background or the 4 year old is wondering who I am talking to and when I will be off the phone. It is tough to go from wearing the mommy hat one minute to the professional hat the next minute and then back to the mommy hat at a moments notice.

In looking at the calendar today, I realized I have not been kid-free since Oct. 3rd. On that day I ran a few errands all on my own and then received a phone call after about two hours wondering if I was going to be home soon. I went from wearing the 'Me' hat to the 'Mommy' hat as quick as my phone can sing Kid Rock's All Summer Long. October 3rd. was 17 days ago. I have not been out of a 50 foot range of a child ever since. I need a little room for air!